Nom de Plume

Once upon a time, people got married much younger than they do today, and they lived at home until they tied the shackles. So giving them the silverware, the plates, the sheets, and of course the multiple toasters was necessary, since they were young and poor, and had nothing with which to run a house.

Fast forward fifty years. Now, people have been on their own for a while before they get hitched. Most have decent-paying jobs, and have stuff to eat off and cook with. Yet the whole wedding registry is still here. Well, the wedding registry upgrade–since it’s about trading in the crappy Ikea stuff for Pottery Barn and Crate and Barrel. Basically, it seems to me to be about the STUFF, since some other schmuck is paying for it.

I know an engaged couple who is registered at Home Depot, and in the interests of getting them something useful for their wedding, searched for their registration. Didn’t find it. I did, however, manage to plumb the depths of avariciousness, and find some pretty interesting stuff, like this “housewarming registry” created by one couple:

–Sanyo 1.7 Cu. Ft. White Compact Refrigerator ($99.00)
–2 ResQ Ladder 25 Ft. Emergency Escape Ladders with Sleeves ($150.00 each)
–PetSafe Wireless Pet Containment System ($279.00)
–Rubbermaid Taupe/Green Deck Storage Box ($69.00)
–Mosquito Magnet 1 Acre, Corded Liberty Mosquito Trap ($495.00)
–Beckett Classic Cistern Fountain ($99.00)
–2 Safety 1st Safe Keeper Security Gates ($29.98 each)
–3 Maytag® White 6,000 Btu Electronic Air Conditioners with Remote ($124.00 each)
–2 Maytag® 65 Pt. Cameo White Portable Electronic Dehumidifier (239.00 each)
–Hampton Bay Pooh Disney Lamp ($39.97)
–2 Progress Lighting 1-Light Weathered Bronze Wall Lantern ($119.00 each)
–Timber-Bilt Highland Kit ($149.00)
–Film-Gard 10 ft. X 100 ft. Clear 6 Mil Construction Sheeting ($26.96)
–DeWalt 3/8 In. 9.6 Volt Cordless Drill Kit ($99.00)
–2 ClosetMaid 4 Ft. ShelfTrack™ Double Hang Organizer (60.97 each)

Total: $3,311.83

Wow, this is sure easier than working and saving up, isn’t it?

Talk about civilized–if it snows, we have the option of working from home because apparently no one can drive in the snow here. And it is supposed to snow tonight. I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

Crossing the 520 bridge sometime last week.

From staying up way too late last night heat gunning the blue paint off the living room floor. Ye Gods, what were they thinking?

Although I detest their little fake prints of “important writers” that grace the walls of the stores,I have to say that I am pleased with Barnes and Noble. I ordered Christmas gifts for Mom and Wayne and the outlaws from them on the last day they guaranteed Christmas delivery. Mom’s package got there in time; Pam’s did not. I wrote to bring the oversight to their attention, and they immediately sent me a $25 gift certificate to apologize.

It’s kind of sad, though, that one is rewarded for complaining.

Steve has taken to describing all the work the previous owner did as “an abortion.”

For example, he has been painting the living room walls–and has had to scrape, spackle, and sand with an electric sander because it’s “an abortion.”

The patched over leaks around the skylights are “abortions.” The jerry-rigged kitchen is “an abortion.” And naturally, the deck on the garage, which he tore down a couple of months ago is retroactively “an abortion.”

He makes me laugh.